Do You Want to Feel Confident and Fulfilled in Your Relationships?
Do you wish you could build more satisfying and trusting relationships with coworkers, friends and potential partners? Does it feel like the relationships you do have are superficial or lack the emotional depth you want and need? It may appear that you’re navigating interpersonal relationships and the dating world successfully, but underneath you might feel insecure and fear sharing your intimate thoughts and feelings. Maybe you felt unheard, unsatisfied or isolated in past relationships and now fear intimacy or don’t know how to be yourself or get your needs met. Or, you might feel lost or abandoned following the loss of a parent or partner or the end of a relationship, and now you associate relationships with disconnection, sadness and pain. You may not know why you are dissatisfied or what you can do to feel more confident and secure as you try to connect with others.
Perhaps you have learned through experience that you have to mask your true feelings and authentic self in order to survive in your work life. But now you are so used to wearing that mask you have lost sight of who you are and what you feel. At times, others may tell you that they can't connect with you or don't know who you really are. And, you know they are right because you have built a wall around yourself as a means of protection. And, while the wall may have been necessary to keep you safe earlier in your life, it may now leave you feeling alone, misunderstood and dissatisfied.
Alternately, you may have put off starting a relationship or a family to focus on your career, and you aren’t sure how to reenter the dating world. Maybe you fear that your personal and professional success will make it hard to find a partner who doesn’t feel threatened or insecure. It might seem like you have to choose between success in your career and happiness in your relationship. Or, it may be that you put so much effort into helping friends, family members and your community that you don’t feel like you have the time or energy to spend on yourself or attracting a partner. Do you wish you could feel confident and secure as you navigate interpersonal relationships and dating in NYC with greater confidence and satisfaction?
Dating Can Be Difficult – Especially in NYC
The relationships we observe and form growing up help shape how we approach interpersonal and intimate relationships as adults. But, those models don’t necessarily fit us and our needs as individuals. And, if the relationship models we saw were not as loving, empowering or connected as we needed, we may become suspicious that others will be able to meet our needs. Relationships help us grow and develop, but they also bring up challenging emotions related to our past experiences. You might feel like you should date the type of people your culture, family or friends expect instead of finding someone who is right for you. Or, maybe you had a series of missed connections or failed relationships that have you questioning yourself and whether or not you even want to try dating again. To make things more difficult, finding friends and dating in NYC can be difficult and brings challenges you may not have faced during school or in other cities. The fast pace, close quarters and almost countless social settings require a clear sense of who you are, what you are searching for in a relationship and how you want to approach the dating process.
Fortunately, there is help and hope. A relationship counselor can help you explore why you feel alone or unhappy and learn how to find and foster healthy, satisfying relationships.
A Relationship Counselor Can Help You Gain Confidence and Skills
Relationship counseling can help you recognize what you need to feel happy and fulfilled in a relationship. I provide a safe space where you can feel comfortable exploring past and existing relationship problems and developing strategies tailored to your specific goals and needs. You can identify your specific relationship patterns and see how certain thoughts or behaviors may unknowingly be preventing you from feeling close and connected with others. Together, we can determine which relationship strategies have been effective and practice new skills and techniques that you can immediately apply in your own life.
I take an active, engaging approach to relationship therapy, helping you reach your goals and develop skills and awareness you can carry with you for the rest of your life. It can be valuable to understand how past interpersonal or intimate relationships have impacted current relationship patterns, and we will take some time early in our work to identify and address fears, doubts and negative self-thoughts. You can then draw from that newfound understanding and increased self-awareness as you build new skills and make meaningful changes in your life. You can learn to recognize and communicate your wants and needs when you are uncomfortable rather than avoiding relationships or projecting how you feel onto others. When you strengthen your relationship with yourself, you can embrace your interests and find greater joy in your experiences and the connections you make. And, by spending time doing things you care about and love in a social setting, you can attract people who share your interests.
I have been working with women from all walks of life and ethnic backgrounds for 20 years, and I am committed to helping other women foster a sense of confidence and satisfaction in their dating lives and relationships. I understand how difficult finding someone and building a relationship can be, especially in New York City. With the guidance and support of a relationship counselor, you can build the confidence and skills you need to feel calm and navigate relationships with a sense of control and satisfaction.
But, you may still have questions or concerns about relationship counseling…
Relationships look different in my culture. Will you respect my values and choices?
I have worked with many people across cultural groups and relationship types, and I recognize that a healthy relationship does not look the same for every person. My goal is to understand your cultural experience and help you figure out how to translate that into your current life experience. It is possible to stay true to your beliefs and values and cultivate the love and relationships you are seeking.
I’ve always struggled in relationships. Is anything really going to change?
Every day is a new opportunity for us to create positive change in our lives, and I’ve seen how much can improve when you work toward personal growth in a warm and supportive environment. We are meant to be in relationships and community with other people, and a counseling relationship can provide you with the guidance and support you need to navigate your everyday life and interactions with greater confidence.
I’m too anxious or embarrassed to be good in relationships.
It is natural to feel stressed, embarrassed or self-conscious following a negative experience or painful rejection, but that doesn’t mean that you can’t reframe your experience, develop new skills and foster happy, fulfilling relationships. Throughout our work together, I help you explore past relationship experiences and how thoughts and behaviors are contributing to feelings of worry and self-doubt. You can learn to recognize what you need to feel safe, secure and valued in your relationships. And, when you build a healthy relationship with yourself, you can feel empowered in your interpersonal and intimate connections.
You Can Feel Confident in Relationships
If you are ready to meet new people, start dating or take your relationships to the next level, or if you have additional questions about relationship counseling in New York City, I invite you to call me at (516) 647-1712 or use my online calendar to schedule a free, 15-minute phone consultation.
You can also learn more about self-care, stress management, work-life balance and other issues that may impact personal and professional relationships in my blog.
"Dr. Brathwaite is kindred spirits with leading ladies who tend to the soul & spirit. She asks the right questions. Ones that get to the core of the issue at hand."